It was splendid to see you trying to escape to the gents in the Pig & Whistle on Saturday evening old chap. Busty Beatrice, the Landlady explained that you had been caught short after eating one of that Mr. Mason’s ’Quickie Meals for Jocks on the Go,’ it seemed to work in your case!
Beatrice explained that you had kindly ordered a pint of ‘The Abbots Toenail’ for me, but in your rush to escape had neglected to pay for it! Thanks!