Desreal: to: MARSHALL

hearts that cry diamond tears;
spirits that walk for a thousand years;
here them calling on that darkest morning;
pulling me under, my thoughts dissapear;

Twilight is a beautiful time, her favorite perhaps. When the sun is recently vanished, and the stars have just become visible. But not tonight. No, tonight everything is black. Thick. The stars are but a memory as she stares into the moonless sky. Her gaze lowers at the first sounds of thunder, sapphire eyes flecking with ice. It is nothing my pet. Leave. Her thoughts pause for the length of one breath, and then she is in motion, turning to leave the distant thunder and the rolling sound of hooves beating on hard and frozen ground. It is when she feels Marshall that she pauses, and the shard hisses. Saphira turns her head just in time to see the outline of her speckled friend.

Immediately her expression softens, and some of the ice melts. Leaving her eyes a clear and soft blue. She takes a few steps towards him, the shard screaming at her to stop, to leave. But she manages to ignore it. Somehow, and knows the Shard will find a way to avoid this in the future. Her eyes meet his for a brief moment before she feels his lips against her scar, and it opens upon contact. She stifles a shudder as the pain radiates through her. The newest slahes in her side protest in agony with each full breath. His voice is an unknown comfort to her, and so easily she slides into his embrace, her lips tracing a wave across his neck. She sighs, delighted. Happy. Content.

And then he blindsides her. She pauses, her eyes grow wide even though he cannot see it. Her body stiffens, and she takes a few steps away from him. Torn between staying and fleeing. Marshall would not know the story she once told Alshain. About how Durden had told her he loved her, and then broke her heart into a thousand pieces. He does not know about her rape…but then, neither did Alshain. She shivers, uncontrollably. And for a moment, a piece of her longs to say it back to him. To reach out and embrace him as lovers do. But she doesn’t, she merely stands there like a deep in the headlights. Frozen.

There are no words she can speak to make this go away. Nothing she can do to erase time and hope this day would never come. She loves you Marshall, but it will never be enough or in the way you desire it. A single tear slides down her damp cheek, and her gaze lowers to the snow beneath her. Her voice is soft, but sure.

“I do love you Marshall… You’re my best friend…but I… you’re right. I love Alshain with everything that I am. I am so sorry… I just... I just wish it were enough.”

She does not want to break his heart, but somehow she knows she has done so already. Before she spoke, before he told her. She now understands the cause for all his recent pain. Her. Another tear glides down her cheek, and she looks away from him. Again torn about staying or running. Oh Marshall, if only you knew how it ached her to do this to you.

“Can’t my friendship be enough? … Please?"

Her eyes finally manage to lift to his, and it is all she can do to stop herself from running into his embrace.

GOLD: S A P H I R A

the siren

you can hold the darkness from you;
if the will is very strong;
but that whisper always haunts you;
cannot change the Siren's Song.