Posted by THE ELEMENTALS on August 19, 2008, 1:20 pm, in reply to "KEEP CHASING PAVEMENTS, BABE {JUDGE}"
Message modified by administrator JudgeJudy August 19, 2008, 11:24 pm
Judge’s note: I will be discounting the weather in this battle since there was so much of a time lapse, and no one was sure exactly what it was. So, footing/weather etc will not be factored in!
CHALLENGER #1 is ALCATRAZ.
Attack One
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Realism: 5/5; this doesn’t strike me as at all unrealistic. Mind you, if we HAD counted the weather (you say that the footing is occasionally slick) you would have lost a point, because the knee requires some lift to hit. But as it is, this is fine.
Power: 4/5; -1 just because I don’t get much of a sense of power from you. The attack itself would cause serious pain and injury if it landed, but your explanations take away from Alcatraz’s raw strength. Trust the judge! We know what attacks hurt and what don’t. Focus more on describing his movements and his strikes, and less on clinical explanations of pain.
Timing: 5/5; No qualms.
Creativity Bonus: 0
ALCATRAZ
Attack Two
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Realism: 4/5; -1 just because the way he swings around seems a little bit odd; I think it’s mostly in the way you describe it. Is he moving forward and twisting, or tucking his hindquarters and pivoting?
Power: 4/5; A cowkick isn’t as powerful as a buck, and you still are spending too long explaining the exact statistics of pain, but this is a solid attack and would do a good amount of damage wherever it hit.
Timing: 3/5; The pivot is a little fast. Even if he’s a lighter and faster breed, it would take him a few seconds to adjust, and then he’d need to catch up to her if she’s moving, etc. You lost one point for each of those aspects (too-fast spin, not accounting for the time he’d take moving to overtake her)
Creativity Bonus: 0
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CHALLENGER #2 is SAPHIRA
Defense One
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Realism: 3/5;
-1 because Alcatraz is not rising very high, he’s only attacking your knee (your heights aren’t SO different for this to be an enormous deal), and therefore your target is unrealistic – you would be more likely to be injured, because his hooves would act as a buffer between you and he and they would hurt you more than the collision would shock him
-1 because where you took damage is unrealistic. I’m sorry, I just honestly don’t see how she could come away with a forearm injury when he’s got a split-second ahead of her (she isn’t a mind reader) and at the angles they are… it just doesn’t make a lot of sense. I could understand a knee injury like he intended, or perhaps lower, but you’re expecting him to be much higher than he said he was. Also, a sliding attack would be as bad as a slam in different ways; the damage would be less localized, the bruise would be more likely to affect more nerves and muscle movements, and the swelling would be more generalized.
Damage: 3/5; I would have liked to see you take more damage from his attack. You brush off the injury to the forearm as though it’s nothing (-1), and ignore it in subsequent movements (-1).
Timing: 5/5; I don’t have any timing issues here.
Creativity Bonus: 0
SAPHIRA
Defense Two
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Realism: 4/5; A cow-kick is a centralized and often more accurate attack than a double-barreled kick (though it does have half the damaging power), and you fully underestimate it here. Other than that, coming closer is a decent way of lessening a kick’s power in any circumstance.
Damage: 3/5; Again, you do not take enough damage in the face of what would be an intensely painful hit (-1). Getting kicked like she did would be like getting kicked in the shin by an extremely good soccer player, and would impact her movements more significantly than she allows it to (-1).
Timing: 5/5; Again, no problem.
Creativity Bonus: 0
SAPHIRA
Attack One
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Realism: 4/5; You lost points above for the aspects of this attack that I feel are unrealistic, so I won’t repeat them or remove more here. I am however removing 1 point for expecting him to topple; that’s not realistic. He’s not very high and his center of balance is behind the shoulder. It’s harder than you’d think to throw a horse to the ground.
Power: 3/5; I just don’t get a sense of power from this. It would injure Saphira as much as it would injure Alcatraz, which definitely lessens its power(-1), and the way it is described makes it seem more like a forceful bump than anything lasting(-1).
Timing: 5/5; No qualms.
Creativity Bonus:
SAPHIRA
Attack Two
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Realism: 4/5; The only realism issue I have with this is that you don’t consider whether or not he’s moving. He could have immediately moved forward after kicking you.
Power: 3/5; This is not a very powerful attack. It sounds like she’s just sort of swiping at the knee, and in reality unless she had some leverage she wouldn’t do much damage this way. Horses aren’t designed to be able to kick hard with their front legs.
Timing: 5/5; I removed the point in realism for movement concerns, so I won’t penalize again here.
Creativity Bonus: 0
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ALCATRAZ
Defense One
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Realism: 5/5; There’s nothing you could really do in this situation but take it, which you did.
Damage: 3/5; You really brush off her attack. Even if it’s unrealistic, you need to take the damage as realistically presented in the circumstances. Whatever impact she had would still hurt like a mofo, regardless of whether or not it was lessened by situational angles or whatever. All you do is grunt and say that what you’re feeling must pale in comparison to her; that’s bad form.
Timing: 4/5; You wouldn’t be THAT far ahead of her, especially if you came at each other head on – she would be only a split second behind you in rearing, etc.
Creativity Bonus:
ALCATRAZ
Defense Two
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Realism: 5/5; Absolutely fine. You used natural instinct, and the closeness she manufactured to predict without seeming like a superhorse. Kudos.
Damage: 5/5; MUCH better than your first defense. I would have liked to see some mention of flexor tendon swelling, as you would definitely be suffering from that, but you clearly take appropriate damage.
Timing: 5/5; Fine.
Creativity Bonus: 0
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OVERALL
ALCATRAZ
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Total from Above: 52/60
Elemental Score*: You were neutral elements, so no bonuses or penalties here.
Bonus Points**: None.
Penalties***: -1 for nitpicking. You shouldn’t do the judge’s job. Constantly pointing out flaws gets annoying, both for the opponent and for the judge reading it.
GRAND TOTAL – 51/60
SAPHIRA
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Total from Above: 47/60
Elemental Score*: You were neutral elements, so no bonuses or penalties here.
Bonus Points**: None.
Penalties***: -1 for nitpicking. You shouldn’t do the judge’s job. Constantly pointing out flaws gets annoying, both for the opponent and for the judge reading it. -1 also for clarity; I had a lot of trouble understanding what you were saying in several instances. The sentence fragments get confusing.
GRAND TOTAL –45/60
By my judgment, ALCATRAZ is the winner of this fight. Congratulations to both, this was very good! I hope this was detailed enough for you both, but if you have questions don’t hesitate to ask!
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